Music has entirely shaped, if not saved, my life. Many of my day-to-day decisions revolve around music, I book holidays to go see bands, I have spent £1000s over the course of my existence on music in one way or another. But when I am having a particularly bad time, I find it very difficult to listen to music. As a moody teen I would blast whatever band happened to be my favourite that week til I got told to ‘turn that racket down’ (and then I’d turn it back up again because I was very obstinate); as an adult with depression I find it almost impossible to hear even the songs I love most in the world during a rough patch.
The events of the last six weeks have left me altogether too vacant to engage with music, which has made compiling this month’s playlist more a task than a joy. The release of Tranquility Base Hotel & Casino marked the first time I was able to sit through an album. And then I went back again, and again, and again until Arctic Monkeys’ newest and most interesting ever output was permanently branded on my brain. And after hitting rock bottom (somehow) on a weekly cycle, I find myself only now finally and cautiously emerging out of the darkest part of my cloud and excited about music again. Here are some Very Emo (if not in genre, then in lyric) songs that I have listened to, loved, cried to, and/or seen played live this month.